Dear Society

Dear Society,

Why are there laws in place that are treating parents as abusers if we do not respect our child’s new gender? And how dare we forget she’s a “he” now. Or vice versa. Why must we accept this change with no questions asked? And remember the new pronouns immediately. Or else. Or else what? Or else you will have to live my story.

I have been calling my child a SHE for 15 years!!! I am 61 years old. I cannot even remember to take my grocery list to the store with me! How do I remember to call her a HE? Give me a break, Society! Please! This new Trans epidemic is all new to me.

I was doing just fine raising my daughter. I let her color her hair a million times. I let her style it all sorts of interesting ways. I let her wear ALL black and scream GOTH at me. Then I let her wear all dragons, skulls, chant spells... Even listen to loud obnoxious music with the lyrics screaming sex, drugs and everything goes! SHE was now EMO. Oh joy! The fun never ends with these teenagers. Wouldn’t you agree, parents? But we continue to love our kids unconditionally. We always will.

Then SHE decides to be “Bi- “She screams power to the bi- humans! I did nothing but love her thru this new identity, too. No big deal. No problem. She changes her mind again. She decides she is now a lesbian! Okie dokie. No problemo!

Finally, the game changes and transgender comes up to the plate. Well....

I owe Society a heartfelt thank you. Thank you for forcing the school to not mention to me that my daughter was using a boy’s name. But coming home after school a girl. Why did you not tell me? I do not get it. I admit, I did not see this one coming. So, thank you Society, for teaching my child to keep secrets. The one thing I taught her not to do, you undid??!!  How dare you! Because thanks to you, Society, my child ended up being sex trafficked and lost her virginity at the tender age of 14 years old. To a rapist in Virginia. This trafficker/rapist takes her to DC. And another trafficker takes her to Maryland. My worst fear for my daughter has become a reality. The rapes continue.

She was only 14 years old when she ran away. By the grace of God, the FBI and MD Marshal rescue her late at night. Nine days later. FBI calls me, “Your daughter has been found in Maryland! Come pick her up in the morning.” Praise God! I live in Virginia. I pack the back seat of my car with blankets, pillows, her stuffed animals, and snacks. I arrive in a heap of tears. I find the juvenile jail they are keeping her in. I knock on the facility’s door and cry out for my daughter.

Society speaks to me from a closed door, “We cannot let you see your child. You need a Maryland judge to allow this.” I respond, “Why? Can I please just see her??” Society shouts, “NO!” I sit in my car all day waiting for the 4:00 hearing. I sit quietly crying and praying. I cannot, for the life of me, figure out why. I cannot even see her. Or comfort her or love her or hold her. The tears flow. And flow….

Now, please permit me to share a few ugly details of the legal attack I was so kindly punched in the face with. Abuse charges. Why? I am not using her new pronoun. How dare I! Well, I just cannot thank you enough, Society! Your generosity is overwhelming. You know what they say, “What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger.” I will be Superman before you know it! I will change my pronouns, too! I am kidding. I am not a comedian. I will keep my day job. I apologize. This is truly no laughing matter. Egregious. So very egregious. I feel like I am losing my mind. Am I? Is this a dream? A nightmare? I continue to shake my head in the hopes that I wake up.

At 3:30 I am finally in the courtroom waiting for the Judge to enter at 4:00.

I address the court, “Good afternoon, your Honor. I am here to bring my child home. Why can’t I see her? Why won’t you let her go? I do not understand! She has no criminal charges?”  Tears blur my vision. I cannot hold them back. The court pauses so that I can catch my breath.

Read on....  but be careful you don’t choke. This is a very bitter pill to swallow.

Society proceeds to steal my parental rights. Right from under me! They refuse to let my child go. You just cannot make this stuff up! Shame on you, Society! Shame on you!

I then nicely explain to the judge that I am quite sure I know my child better than Society does. But Society says, “Oh no you do not. We will not let her go!”

So, I repeat my request, “Please, Society, please let my child go so that I can take her home. And give her the support she desperately needs and deserves. She just went thru nine straight days of rape by sick men. Her last rape being yesterday! She NEEDS me. I am her mother! She needs trauma support. Family support. Her mental health support team that I already have established back home in Virginia since she was 12 years old!” But Society again refuses. I ask if my daughter has at least been treated by a trauma support specialist of any kind while in their care. Society advises me that they are unable to offer her trauma support as she is not a resident. Then LET HER GO!

Hmmmm... reminds me of a Bible story. In the book of Exodus, Moses to Pharaoh, “Let my people go.” The Pharaoh will not let the people go. Moses asks again. “Let my people go!” Again, Pharaoh does not let the people go. Seven times Moses requests that Pharaoh let his people go! But Pharaoh continues to refuse. Until a child dies. His own son. But that’s another story. Or is it????

Why did Maryland not let her go immediately? Because Society decides I have abused my beautiful daughter. I keep forgetting her new pronoun. Unbelievable. I called her a “SHE”? Can you even imagine! I used her legal name and pronoun. Society advises that I now need to be investigated by both Maryland and Virginia DSS. I am labeled an abusive mother until DSS clears me. Both states finally clear me of any abuse with no finding. Yet, Society still will not let my child go. True story.

Society, please let my child go. Please allow me to finish raising my own child!

Society refuses to even let me visit with my child. Just a visit! I am not even allowed to see her. Much less hold her. Rock her. Love her. My heart breaks into a zillion pieces. Uncontrollable tears pour down my face. I cannot breathe. And Society continues to refuse me my parental rights. For the next 71 days!

Hearing #2. I beg the Judge to at least take my daughter out of the juvenile jail. My child has NO street smarts and now you have her in a jail with city girls who have criminal records! Why? She has no criminal charges. The Judge agrees and my daughter is provided shelter in a Children’s Home while the case continues. Society advises the Judge that their goal is to have my child placed in a Maryland foster home. This is what Society believes is in the best interest of my child? Come to find out, they placed HER in the boy’s unit! My heart stops. She is where? In with street tough boys?! With a female body? I go throw up. Why did they just not let this child go?

Dear Society, I am not only this child’s mother, but I am also this child’s grandmother. I adopted her at 2-years old after my son passed at age 27. You see, I am all she has. I had every right to take my child home. But Society’s new laws refused to let her go. I was legally forced to bow down to Society’s legal “feelings.” I endure 17 hearings and am compelled to call my daughter a HE. I beg the Lord to not let me forget or choke on the word. I beg Him for courage. To stay strong for my daughter’s sake. The Lord answers my prayer. I am grateful. I have no time to be weak.

My beautiful, straight “A” student, writer of poetry, innocent daughter. I am at my wit’s end. I call attorney after attorney. Not one attorney would take my case. Oh, I take that back. One attorney agreed to charge me $30,000 just for one Appeal hearing. I investigate trying to see if I can mortgage my home. Until I get a call from Society. My child is missing. On their watch. She runs away again. Society merely reports her missing to the local sheriff. That’s it!  Like my missing child is no big deal. I am frantic!

I call the FBI, the Marshals, the national Missing Children’s sites. I am in shock. I begin to shake uncontrollably. I fall to my knees and beg God to please save her. Again.

Thanks a lot, Society. You have some nerve. You are a disgrace to humanity.

Now, instead of nine days, this poor child had to suffer an additional 83 days in the hands of another trafficker. She is now in the state of Texas. Being raped. Thank you, Society. Why didn’t you let my child go? Why? Why! Because Society wanted to force me to eat more of their legal crap.

Hey Society, I have news for you. I have every right to raise my child as I see fit. I am not, nor have I ever been abusive to my beautiful granddaughter. I refuse to allow you to finish raising her. With your secrets and surgeries and chemicals. I refuse! Leave us alone. I got this! Because obviously, Society, you have NO idea what you are doing. I was not the abuser. Society was. Society stole my beautiful daughter’s innocence. Society, you alone are to blame for breaking my daughter into pieces.

TRAGIC.

My daughter is no longer living with me. But by the grace of God, she is alive. I am allowed four-hour visits once a week. I faithfully drive the eight hours to see her every week. I am in tears every mile of the way. She hugs me every time. It is all the gratitude I need. My heart begins to beat again. God is awesome!

When everyone saw gender, I kept SCREAMING trauma. Nobody listened. Society ignored me. Blatantly. They failed this child in every way.

She now resides in a residential trauma facility. In Virginia. Her home state. I tell her she is not broken, she’s just scarred, as I struggle to hold back tears.

Think this story can’t happen to your child?!! Well, buckle your seatbelts, parents. Because it can.

Society denied me by parental rights. They denied me my Freedom of Religion rights. As if they had no bearing. My beliefs. My Christian belief that does not allow my conscience to authorize a horrible surgery to my child. To cut off healthy body parts that God gave her. Tragic in my book. And to chemically transition my child without my knowledge?! This is right? This is moral? On who’s authority? Does Society have no morals left at all! I am shaking my head in disgust.

It is now my passion to fight for laws that need to be set in place that prevent future horror stories. Not all parents are abusive. Can I get a witness?!

Dear Society, I am not on the right or left side of your political games. I am not even left or right-handed. I am ambidextrous! I am on the child’s side. I am on their side because I love and pray for every single child in this world. I pray morning, noon and night. I am a volunteer CASA since 2015. My passion is abused children! To be accused of child abuse hurt me to my core. Almost broke me. But let me warn you, Society, if one person dares to inject chemicals into my child, or cut up her healthy body behind my back, I will fight back. Let the battle begin. You messed with the wrong mother! And you definitely messed with the wrong Grandmother! I am a force to be reckoned with. I have God on my side. God does not make mistakes. My child was born in the correct body. Do not even try to convince me otherwise. Ever. And who were you to tell her she was??? You know my child better than I do?  Unbelievable. Just wrong. On every level.

Let’s go parents! Fight for these kids! They cannot even balance a checkbook book, much less their brains! Let our voices be heard. Stop trying to raise our children!

A Grandmother’s rant over. For now.